Visitor Spotlight: Auckland, N.Z.
Here is a Jackie & Fritz first. A Visitor Spotlight piece written by someone who is actually familiar with the place that is being featured. Don't think that this display of responsible coverage will become the standard here at J&F. I was scanning the world of blogs one day and stumbled across Michelle Park's thejamjar.com, which she has been writing for eight years. She had been living in Auckland, New Zealand, a city I was preparing to feature, so I sent her an email asking if she'd like to write our first-ever informed piece. And she said yes! So... Auckland through the eyes of Michelle "thejamjar.com" Park:
This is my fifth attempt at telling you about Auckland, New Zealand. I have tried to talk about the city I lived in for 20+ years in a positive light: I tried to talk about the shape of the land and ended up talking about dormant volcanoes and isthmuses and waterways and sounded far too much like my old Geography teacher who is currently in prison for fiddling with young school girls; I tried to dig up some entertaining stories to demonstrate the quirkiness of the culture of New Zealand's largest city but all I ended doing was documenting the many and varied ways domestic violence murders innocents in a terrifyingly increasing and disturbingly creative rate; I tried show how the city discovers solidarity during the America's Cup regatta or fighting against the location of a new rugby stadium but really, it's just resistance to change and backbiting and mostly, the rest of New Zealand spends more time talking about Auckland's goings-on than the people of the city care enough to do; I tried to string together anecdotes to illustrate the ways Auckland's relate to visitors, but I could only remember that band of students who harangued my friend to tears and threatened her personal safety because they heard her American accent and decided George Bush was all her fault; but alas, I have failed. Four times I have failed, and in doing so have discovered the reason.
I moved to Middle Suburbia, Manukau City, Auckland over 20 years ago. I never thought anything of it, really. Partly because the move was never discussed with me by my (then) Aucklander husband - I was just told he had a new job, it was in Auckland, we were moving next week. I had visited the "big city" a few times, mostly to see his Evil Parents so they could chip some more of my confidence and sense-of-self away, and to remind me that I was a millstone around their son's neck and I continued to hold him back in his life, and his career. I always hated those visits, and always found the city sprawling and daunting. So many fast cars, too many unfamiliar land marks, I felt disoriented all the time in those first years. But we moved, and we raised our family there, and we fought, and I threw his parents out of my house, and we divorced and I pretty much covered all my bases while living in Auckland.
But I never, ever liked the city. I was never proud of it, I never liked showing it to visiting friends and family, and I didn't miss it whenever I was free of it. There are good people there, as there are everywhere, and some of my dearest friends still live there. But by and large, it was not a city I felt any attraction or affection to or for outside my close family (excluding Satan's Spawn, my parents-in-law) and close circle of friends.
Auckland is a sprawling city, and if you don't have access to a car it's problematic to navigate on public transport, though, to be fair, that has been improving over the last few years. The inner city offers an urban choice over suburban lifestyles that run out from the centre of the city to the rural life-style of the 10-acre blocks. People aren't particularly friendly though they're not unfriendly. Kiwi's in general tend to keep themselves to themselves, but if you break into their concentration with a hello or a question of direction, they'll generally help and hardly ever cut your arm off with a machete - though that has been known to happen. We don't carry guns as a rule, you see, but knives and blunt instruments of damage are the common cause of newspaper headlines after a weekend of binge drinking and street racing.
Most of New Zealand seem to look on anyone who lives in Auckland as money grubbing, selfish, egotistical arseholes and regard us all with the nickname JAFA - which, while the name of one of our favourite childhood confectioneries (most often consumed at the cinema), it actually stands for Just Another Fucking Aucklander. A lot of their taxes go to maintain Auckland's infrastructure - its roads, its rail, its access to cheaper fuel. Aucklanders joke that there is no New Zealand past the Bombay Hills (the range of hills that border its Southern exit) and consider everyone else in NZ provincial and rural as too stupid to move to Auckland.
So, pretty much, we are arseholes in Auckland. We clog up the motorways with cars, and send all our money to Japan via the inner city car parks. We each leave huge footprints on the environmental landscape while washing detergent down our drains and into our water systems every Saturday when the BMW and the 4 wheel drive need a wash.
After living in Auckland for over 20 years, it has taken my recent relocation to Melbourne, Australia to realise what it feels like to really like the town you live in. I have never felt anything but functional, residential, circumstantial connection with Auckland, and have decided that I never did like that town.
PS: I never did get that job working for Tourism Auckland :)
Visit Michelle Park's thejamjar by clicking here.
